DONT LOOK DOWN. LOOK FORWARD.

 "If it doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you"  Fred Devito

The acronym for for fear is: False Evidence Appearing Real. For some this is a crippling emotion. Stopping us dead in our tracks. Unable to make a decision or take action on something in our life that needs our attention. Change is needed for continual self improvement. If we allow ourselves to be paralyzed by the fear of change, we then stop our personal growth toward our destiny. Allowing ourselves to lean on all the false evidence or situational things as an excuse to stay stuck or afraid. Not giving ourselves permission to grow and not holding ourselves accountable for our actions. We are the problem, but we are also the solution if we get out of our own way.

For others it is a motivator. Giving us the..."Oh ya, watch me." attitude. For some this is like a dare to do and go after x, y & z in life. Working towards our destiny. Not worrying about the "What if...", "Should I..." or "Yea buts..." in life. Just jumping in like a kid without a care in the world. And deal with the "What if's..." as they arise.

Some people get nervous and need to know the final out come of situations before jumping in to them. As if they can head off issue's before they happen. How can we possibly know the outcome of something that has not happened yet? We have to trust that our higher power (whatever you choose to call it) know's what he/she is doing. It is when our faith waivers that we tend to get ahead of ourselves in trying to figure out what is going to happen. This is known as "future tripping". Removing us from our source of guidance and getting out of the right here and now.

I recently experienced something similar with my job change. A couple month's ago I was having some serious issues with a person of power at my job. Causing some health issues and getting no help from upper management or HR. And was afraid to take it higher up for fear of losing my job. That very night after work I recieved a text from a friend about an opening at her company, working for her. At this time she was aware of happenings up to this point but not what I was presently going thru. Higher power moment? I think so! I would have to take a pretty big pay cut to accept this job, but knew that I had to do something. My health and sanity was not worth what I was going thru at the time. So I accepted the position with the love and support of family and friends. I was scared to death regarding the financial accpect of accepting this job. But I knew my higher power was working behind the scenes to make this happen. I just had to trust that he knew what he was doing and would not let me fail. I said my resolution for 2015 was "SCREW FEAR" and keep pushing to better myself no matter what the cost. I guess my higher power was listening and testing my ability to stick with it. SO here we are. And so far things have been good. Looking forward to the opportunities that lay ahead for me.

See folks when one door closes another will always open. It's just a matter of walking thru the very door thats opening or stand paralyzed with fear of the "What if's...", "Should I's..." or "Yea but's...".  All of our lives have a purpose, even if we cannot see that in the moment. Whether it is to be there for a friend like mine was for me, or to just be reseptive to to walking thru the opening door and taking a chance. A leap of faith if you will. Trusting that your higher power has your back. Ever reminding us that he is trying to reach us in even the most mundane of circumstances. Keeping us attentive to everyone and everything in our lives.

Love yourself enough to let go of the false evidence. Take a chance. Embrace your challenges. Be there for someone who is in need. Be there for yourself!

"Focus on where you want to go, not on what you fear." Anthony Robbins

As always please keep the men and woman of all branches of our military in your prayers. So they may one day have a safe return home, as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. God Bless.

SNOWFLAKE

              "Be yourself; everyone else is already taken"  Oscar Wilde

With every new year comes resolutions and goals. Most of the time it is to lose weight, get in shape and if a smoker...quit smoking. But has anyone ever said "this year my resolution is to get mentally and spiritually healthy"? Maybe not out loud like we do the other noticeable things, rather inside so no one will hold us accountable for our words. I know I have. Well this year I am saying that this is my resolution, to get more fit mentally and spiritually. Please don't confuse spirituality with church to going, bible thumping, preaching to you on a regular basis type of spirituality. Being spiritual to me, is just finding an inner peace no matter what that may be. Webster describes it as having similar values and ideas, related or joined in spirit.

Now I know getting mentally and spiritually fit is not going to happen in one year. Hell it will probably take me the rest of my life.  HaHa An old timer once told me, "honey it took you this long to get this way and it will take you that long if not longer to get better."  What that comment did for me; was offer hope. Hope in the aspect of not wanting to give up on the broken person I had become. Hope that there was light at the end of the tunnel and to not give up. It offered a sense of comfort and peace, that as long as there was a willingness within my being to get better mentally and spiritually, that it was possible. Anything is possible and attainable if you want it bad enough. And willing to put in the hard work to make it happen. We only fail when we stop trying.

"Success does not happen without some failures" Steve Harvey

Don't compare yourself to others progress or story. Just like snowflakes, no 2 are the same. Nor are there any 2 people the same. Maybe similar, but not exact. We were all created different for a reason. To make the world what it is today...Unique.

My opinion is, that God allows us to experience things similar to others so we can offer a genuine, heartfelt, compassionate understanding of what they are going through. Offering support, encouragement and most importantly HOPE. The same kind of hope someone once offered me. Reassuring me that all will be okay again.

One of my favorite poems is Just a Weaver by Benjamine Malachi Franklin and the author got it so right when they said:

The dark threads are as needed
In the Weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern he has planned.

Just as snowflakes are necessary for a particular purpose in life. So are each one of us. Hold on to the HOPE that all will be well again and learn to enjoy the journey your on.  Both mental and spiritually.

As always please keep the men and woman of all branches of our military in your prayers. So they may one day have a safe return home, as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. God Bless.

Calling all Angels

I've noticed a lot of people lately posting angel pics online. I personally believe that we all have angels close to us at all times. I also believe that if we allow ourselves to be open to it, we can feel their presence around us. I for one have been feeling mine on a regular basis. Even had a little white feather fall on me in the kitchen the other day. I have nothing with feathers any where close to the kitchen.  Seems lately there has also been a lot of deaths close to me. Either through a friend or another family member. Not sure if that is because I'm getting older or if some how the 2 things are tied together. Age and/or the angels showing reason for their presence.

I would like to share a story about how our higher power (whatever you choose to call yours) works behind the scenes on our behalf. My Aunt & a close friend of hers (both widows) decided to take a trip out of town just to get away for a little bit. While there they struck up conversation with another couple staying at the same hotel. They were discussing a concert at the local casino that was going on. The couple sharing how they were going & how much they paid for their tickets. Later that afternoon my Aunt & her friend decided to try to get tickets as well. They were successful & got their tickets for much less than the couple paid. They tried to find the couple at the concert & were unsuccessful. They thought maybe at breakfast they could share their news about getting to attend the same show. Again, no luck. My Aunt & her friend decided to pack up & head home. While my Aunt was loading the car she thought she had heard her name called, but when she looked up no one was around. She continued packing her things & every time she went in to see if her friend was ready, her friend was not around. Getting a little worried my Aunt started asking the clerk if she had seen her friend...Just then my Aunt spotted her friend coming out of a room that was not theirs & crying. It was the couples room they had friended while staying there. The husband had died! Now see folks, God knew what this poor woman was about to experience & he sent 2 angels in the flesh to show love (hope) & encouragement (strength). As they have already been where she is (experience). There is no such thing as coincidence.

Every problem comes to break us or make us. The choice is ours. We all have a story to tell and share with others. We all have a purpose in life. ALL of us!

I have endured abuse both mental & physical. Neglect & abandonment etc etc etc. While I have not had it as bad as other's, nor had it as easy as some it's my life's journey & story to be shared. I choose to share my experience, strength & hope through this blog. My ONLY wish is that it helps just one person. And that, this person finds the courage to not give up & embrace all they experience in their life. Both good & bad. Then pay it forward to share their experience, strength & hope with another.

When we question our purpose in life with all the how's & why me, just remember all things for a reason...both good & bad. Without one we cannot know the other. And without our stories we cannot have strength & hope to share with others. Your story is yours & yours alone. You may catch yourself saying..."my experiences won't help someone else."  Quite the contrary. Good or bad this is our overall purpose in life. To help each other & help make this life/world a better place while we are here. Trust that our higher power ALWAYS comes through for us. Call on your angels to help if you need to. They are right by our side. Calling all angels.

As always please remember the men & woman of all branches of the military in your prayers. As they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. God bless.

YOU ARE HERE

"Accept your existing conditions. Once you accept what circumstances you are in; you can then begin to see what's possible for your life."  Author unknown

Learning to accept & appreciate where you are in life at this moment in time may be one of the most challenging things for us to do. But believe that it is attainable. For me I have to first go through a series of questions. Most of the time the first question I tend to ask is, why. Why is this happening? Why am I going through this? What am I supposed to learn from this? What if anything can I do about this situation? How important is it? Trust and know that all things happen for a reason. Good and/or bad.

I recently went through a situation where I gave my heart to someone I thought was very good for me & my daughter. He had all the qualities I was looking for. Or so I thought. I did everything I could to show this person that I was not their past & I was not out for getting what I could get. I showed love, support & encouragement along the way. We were even discussing moving in & building a future together. But then my gut intuition kicked in. And full throttle. So I paid attention to it & did some research. What I found was not what I had expected. I found that there were many lies that had been told along the way. And some not so little. This made me see this person in a different light. Knowing that trust was and is such a huge deal to me, this hurt. Why is this happening? Why did he feel the need to lie to me? What were his true intentions with me? And the questions continued to race through my mind as I tried to make sense of all this. What I had to stop & remind myself of, is that all things happen for a reason. Look for the positive in all this. I was able to list several... I still have my dignity, I still have a home I can afford by myself, his lies do not define the person I am or was with him, my daughter was not effected by this and the list goes on.

That is when this topic hit me. It's like being at a rest stop on the highway. You go in to stretch your legs,go potty, get something to drink; and on your way out you stop & look at the map to see it says "you are here". In your mind you may think "uugghh I have so much farther to go." or "uugghh I have not made it very far."  While you may not like that you have only made it so far, you are ok with it. Because you know that if you keep going, you will get where you want to be. The same is true in life. Accepting that you are where you are suppose to be in this moment in time. In life. That there is a lesson to be learned on this road you are traveling. Just know that you are on the right path & let that ease your yearning to have it ALL & wanting it right NOW. We all want the better job, the perfect relationship, the nice house etc. I personally struggle with these very things. I stop myself by saying "in due time".

I recently watched a snip it on line of a man named Nick Vujcic that was born without any arms or legs & at 10yrs old tried to commit suicide. Thankfully enough he failed & now is an inspirational speaker around the world. He said & I quote "you can be angry with what you don't have or you can be grateful for what you do have." Very powerful & provides another perspective for the way we view our situations.

It's easy to let our circumstances determine how we think and what we do. Yes some events are devastating and seem to have nothing positive about them. In those moments we must lean on our higher power for answers, strength & guidance to get us through it. Becoming grateful is the strongest, safest means of feeling good now. It not only alters our moods, but it changes our perspective on all details of our lives. God has a plan and everything happens on his time. We need to let go and trust this and the process along the way. Enjoy the journey or you will surely miss out on the blessings.

As always please keep our men and woman of all branches of the military in your prayers. So they may one day be brought home safely as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. God Bless

SET SAIL

"Every human being is a problem in search of a solution."
  Ashley Montagu

No matter what faces us--an unhappy relationship, a serious operation or feeling uselessness or helplessness. It's vital to realize that there is a solution. We need to stay in the positive no matter how hard it is in that moment of time. Focus on what if anything we can do about the problem at hand and act accordingly.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do in life, while searching for the solution is love yourself through the process. This is an essential part of life. Loving yourself means having self respect, self acceptance, self compassion & sense of worthiness. It is by far the bravest thing you will ever do. If you don't love yourself how can you expect others to love, respect, accept and/or have compassion for you. Why is it so much easier to do this for others rather than ourselves? I don't know. I for one, REFUSE to stop trying to find the answer to that question.

 Be the friend to yourself that you are to others. Best advice I ever received. Forgive yourself. Love yourself. Be good to yourself. Set healthy boundaries for yourself. And most importantly, be patient with yourself.  There is a positive aspect to boundary setting. We learn to listen to ourselves and identify what hurt us and what we don't like. But we also learn to identify what feels good. Along with what we will or will not tolerate. Having boundaries doesn't complicate life; we set boundaries to simplify life.

The second most important thing to remember is to be patient with yourself. Accept where you are in life and that you are human. Accept with that you WILL make mistakes.  Own them and grow from them. Don't beat yourself up over them. After all, you would not do that to a friend. Would you?!

We often times forget to allow ourselves to fail, even though our growth up to now has been a series of failures that we've learned from. With patience, we allow ourselves to take chances we might not otherwise explore. Life has and remains to be patient with us so far, now it's our turn.

If you have a boat and never untie it to sail, it will remain docked and never sail. We only fail when we stop trying and never untie our inner potential to set sail.

Whatever your current situation, step back and let your higher power work through you. You'll be amazed at the miracles that occur. When your will and the higher powers will are aligned, all things become possible. When it seems you have no recourse, you can always pray.

Be the best you possible. Be vulnerable. Be afraid. But most of all know that you are worthy of loving yourself and having others love you in return.

NEVER GIVE UP ON YOU!!!!

As always please remember the men and woman of all branches of military in your prayers, as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. God bless.

RELEASE IT

The Upside of Anger     Joan Allen & Kevin Costner
"...is the person you become. Hopefully someone that wakes up one day & realizes their not afraid of it's journey. Someone that knows truth is best of a partially told story. That anger like growth comes in spurts & fits. And in its wake leaves a new chance of acceptance & the promise of calm."

We can't always help what happens to us in life. We can choose how we deal with it. Watch your words & actions in spurts of anger. Remembering you can not take back what's been said or done. Allow yourself a 24hr soak, to process the situation; then if need, act accordingly. Sometimes the best thing to do in a situation, is nothing. Believe me I know 1st hand how hard that is.  Action vs reaction, for every action has a consequence.

Typically anger consists of 3 components...Thinking (negative thoughts), feeling (various emotions) & acting out of anger. Actually there are health benefits to releasing anger from your body. When you stuff anger it can have reverse effects. Causing anxiety, depression, along with putting stress on the cardiovascular system. Address don't suppress it. Get to the root of what's really behind & causing the anger. Find a healthy way to deal with it. I personally love my 100 lb punching bag.

Acceptance is key to new chances at better tomorrow's. Feet it, deal with it & let it go. Change can be uncomfortable. But good change = growth. And growth feels way better than anger & resentment. Not to mention better for your health. Hanging on to anger steels your energy & joy. Blocking you from having peace, love & authentic happiness. Remind yourself that this will pass & that ALL things in life happen to teach us some life lesson. No matter how much it hurts or angers us in that moment. Don't get stuck in the resentment. Let go & let God.

Everybody makes mistakes. Who among us is perfect? None. We have made many mistakes in our lives that have probably brought inconveniences to others. If we can learn to treat the faults of others with patience & understanding instead of anger & resentment, we may find others treating us accordingly. Isn't that what it's all about anyhow?!

"The only constant thing in life, is change" Change happens when we allow our self to feel & accept whatever caused this anger/fear. We are the masters of our own fate! We carry all of the tools to meet every challenge head on. Don't be afraid of your life journey. Embrace the promise of calm & hope for something better.

Please remember the men & woman of all branches of military in your prayers. As they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. Have a safe & happy holiday weekend.  God Bless.

Mind Gears

"Watch your thoughts. They become your words. Watch your words. They become your actions. Watch your actions. They become your habits. Watch your habits. They become your character. Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny"

We are not responsible for the thoughts that enter our mind. We are however responsible for how long we let it/them stay in our mind. And responsible for our actions if we act out because of those thoughts. Spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle says "the problem most people have is not thinking; it is not knowing how to stop thinking."  For me that is so true. There are days when I can't shut off my thoughts & often wonder why am I made up this way. Why can't I just not care?! Why do I have to analyze everything in life?! Why cant I just tell myself "just because" & move on?!   I have come to the conclusion that I have been let down so many times in life, that somewhere along the line I have taught myself that if I can control the things that happen to me then I won't be as hurt or disappointed. When in reality; I CANT control anything that happens! That's life & it is going to happen no matter what we do to stop it. Most of us are afraid of things we can't control. Life is one of those things folks.

We have to learn how to roll with the punches. The more we do this, the more it becomes habit & the easier it gets. They say that it takes 21 days to break a habit. How about if we use that for the better? How about if we take those 21 days to build a better habit? Breaking the cycle with self love, learning how to let go & giving our self permission to just "BE" in the moment. Let go & let God or whatever you choose to call your higher power. Give yourself positive affirmations everyday. Treat yourself the same way you would a friend.

The definition of Character is; to have a moral or ethical quality. To have qualities of honesty, courage or the like of integrity. Honesty & integrity are not hard for me. It's having & showing courage everyday that I struggle with. I may put on a good front on the outside. But on the inside I am pushing myself with everything in me some days.  Higher power, help me stop expecting so much from myself. Help me be true to myself & only what I am capable of doing. Help me to be the best "ME" you intended in this life.

What others think of us DOES NOT define who we are or who we are meant to be. Fear will pass. Regret is FOREVER!!

"The best thing about the past is that it's over. The best thing about the future is that it's yet to come. The best thing about the present is that it's here now"  Richard Bandler

Don't waste precious time consumed in thoughts all the time. Enjoy the present. Enjoy the here and now. Life is to short & none of us are promised another day here on earth. Embrace this life you were given and all the lessons that come with it. NOTHING happens without a reason. Without a purpose. Do good, show love.

As always please remember the men & woman of all branches of our military as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. Pray that they also may return home safely to enjoy the here and now.