The Dash

The Dash Poem by Linda Ellis


I read of a man who stood to speak

At the funeral of a friend.

He referred to the dates on her tombstone

From the beginning to the end.

He noted that first came the date of her birth

And spoke of the following date with tears,

But he said what mattered most of all

... Was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time

That she spent alive on earth

And now only those who loved her

Know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own,

The cars, the house, the cash,

What matters is how we live and love

And how we spend our dash.

So think about this long and hard;

Are there things you’d like to change?

For you never know how much time is left

That can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough

To consider what’s true and real

And always try to understand

The way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger

And show appreciation more

And love the people in our lives

Like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect

And more often wear a smile,

Remembering that this special dash

Might only last a little while.

So when your eulogy is being read

With your life’s actions to rehash

Would you be proud of the things they say

About how you spent your dash?

Share a Smile

"A smile costs nothing, but gives so much. It enriches those who give it. It takes but a moment, but the memory lasts forever. None is so rich or mighty that he can get along without it, and none is so poor, but that he cannot be made richer by it. A smile creates happiness in the home, promotes good will in our school and is the cornerstone of friendship. It can perk up the wary, bring cheer to the discouraged, bring sunshine to the sad, and is nature's best antidote for trouble. Yet it cannot be bought, borrowed or stolen, for it is something that is of no value to anyone until it is given away. When people are too tired to give you a smile, give them one of yours. No one needs to smile so much as he who has none to give."

Author Unknown

Soldier On

As I had a nice long cry in the shower this morning thinking about this quote I knew I had to post about.  STRENGTH!!!  Strength to push through a love you cant have even if you know it would be an amazing love story. Strength to do one more push up when your arms are like jello. Strength to keep chasing a dream based on your god given talent. Strength to take one more chemo treatment when your body is screaming "I cant do this anymore". Strength to be strong for a loved one who is struggling.  This quote is 100% accurate in we don't know our own strength until we are faced with the very thing that challenges it,whatever that may be.
For me being a single mother and wanting to be the best mother one can be takes strength as well. When I just want lay down and give up I hear a little voice say "mommy can I have..." and I know giving up is not an option. I have to push through whatever is troubling me because this little person did not ask for a part time mother. It is my job to show her how to live with strength and perseverance.  NEVER GIVE UP NEVER SURRENDER!
Pushing through a love you can not have is Gods way of whispering in your ear "not yet my child". And really if you think about it love is all around us in our family and friends so we should get off the pity pot and tell ourselves "you are loved look around you". Never settle for anything less than the true romance that we all deserve. I believe that god places dreams on our hearts and sends us constant reminders of what we are to be focused on and never give up until we achieve the dream with the talent he gave us.
Talk about true strength and perseverance, go through chemo treatment for a cancer that is eating you alive from the inside out. And why does this have to happen to good positive people? Why do the ugly people in the world get a free pass in life? I don't have an answer for that one. What I do know is God has a master plan for all of us and it is in these "why?" moments that we must hang on to the strength he has given each and everyone of us. Along with knowing he has our back if we allow him to.
Bottom line folks is we all have a choice to lay down and give up or dig deep within ourselves and find this thing called strength. We must soldier on through all that life throws our way. You only fail when you stop trying!!!
As always please remember all the men and woman of all branches of the military in your prayers for a safe return home soon as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here back home. Also please continue to pray for all those suffering with something in their lives, whether it be an illness or heartbreak etc.

Just for Today...

"The saddest summary of life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have."
                                                          Author Unknown

How many times have we done something & said to ourselves, "oh well could of, should of, would of." to make an excuse for not trying hard enough or go after what we really want in life. As if this response will some how make the reality of not getting what we wanted less of a regret. Easing our guilt for not pushing ourselves harder or letting go of the fear that may hold us back. Control the negative thoughts that try to occupy space in your head & change your perspective on things. Relax and move with the flow of life letting go of the fear that controls change or lack of. Life is about lessons not regrets. Sometimes more than one person should have to endure in a lifetime but a lesson non the less. The key is not to give up or regret what we have or have not done, not to sink in the black hole called pity feeling sorry for ourselves. Rather learn how to do things differently. Changing what you can and using your energy wisely not wasting it on worry or complaints. If we don't go through these life lessons then we can not & will not be able to grow into stronger more responsible individuals. Life is to short to regret doing things differently or even attempting them at all. There is a difference in wanting to of handled things differently then there is in having a regret over how you handled something, please don't confuse the two. Be gentle on yourself as you would another realizing that it's ok to make a mistake on your journey. Be open and honest with yourself along the way treating others with respect, compassion and dignity. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Become the change you want to see in the world, the person you would want to spend the rest of your life with and/or the person you would want your children to be influenced by.
"Live, Love, Laugh" is one of my  all time favorite sayings and scattered through out my home to remind me to just enjoy life. ALL OF IT!!! Live much, Laugh often, Love more these are simple things that we can all do on a daily basis to help avoid regret along the way. Remember folks none of us are promised tomorrow, we don't get a dress rehearsal, live as if today is your last. Be a participant in life don't stand on the side lines as an observer. Stand up for yourself not letting anyone or anything hold you back from what you want in life. Be who you are in this moment in time just for today! No Regrets!
As always remember the men and woman of all branches of the military in your prayers for a safe return home soon as they are off protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home.

The Leaning Tree

I love how parallel a persons life is to the tree that comes in different sizes, weathered by age and full of notches taken out of its bark because of situations. If you notice it is not afraid to lean on something to help hold itself up just to survive. So then why are we?! Why is it so hard for some of us to reach out and lean on others to help hold them up? Why is it so hard to trust that what we lean on will not let us fall? Why is it so hard to imagine for a moment that the notches we have are life lessons that we may share with another? For me its because I have been burned on different degrees so badly and so often that I'm afraid to lean on others. Seems that when I allow my guard to come down it happens again. Causing me to doubt some of my judgement and question why I continuously put myself out there. Not realizing that what I may be leaning on is not strong enough to hold me up at that moment in time. I realize that I need to push through the fear to get to the other side and I try to take baby steps one day at a time to accomplish that. I have been able to find a couple of people to lean on and am slowly allowing myself to trust they wont let me fall. That my friends is why I continue to push.
I really do believe that there is no such thing as coincidence and that all things happen for a reason. Good or bad. So that we may be able to share our "notches" with others and show them by example how we over came particular life lessons and to be someones leaning post, giving them strength to grow stronger and bigger each day. Just as the tree that leans. While we may all come in different sizes and weathered differently due to our experiences we all have something to learn or share with another. See folks no matter how weathered you are or are not we are forever learning how to do this thing called living life on life's terms. And yes just as the nasty sometimes slippery moss that grows on the leaning tree we will run in to those people that will be just as nasty and slippery. The key is to NEVER GIVE UP, rather continue pushing up or leaning on! I am a work in progress and continue to learn and grow by being open to sharing and receiving. Life is to short to keep our experience, strength and hope to ourselves. I dare you to join me in being someones leaning post, helping them to grow bigger and stronger so they may be able to stand on their own. Step outside of your comfort zone. I promise the lesson you will receive is much bigger then the one you share. I know, I've been there!!
As always please keep all men and woman of the military in your prayers for a safe return home as they are out there protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home.

Self

Note to self:

Self you are a great person,mother,sister,friend and so much more.
Self you deserve to be loved as you would love another.
Self not everyone is going to hurt you intentionally, its ok to trust again.
Self you have the right to demand respect from others.
Self your opinion does matter.
Self you are a passionate,giving & caring person.
Self you have a lot of people that care about you & would do anything for you.
Self NEVER give up going after the things in life that are important to you no matter what!
Self what you have to say is just as important as the next person.
Self NEVER stop taking value in yourself.
Self its ok to take a day off every now and again from life.
Self continue to do good and show love to others around you.

Every now and again folks we have to remind ourselves why we matter & to NEVER give up. There will be those around you that will try to convince you other wise. They will only succeed if you allow them to. Its ok to have a down day and not have a reason for it. I like to refer to that as "Just Be" days. Just be what you want to be that day. If its low key or full throttle, then so be it. To often we are so critical of ourselves and feed into some of the negativity that surrounds us. STOP!!!  Surround yourself with people that will help pick you up or if need be hold you up for a minute. I'm blessed with a GREAT group of people both near and far. That being all the fuel I need to keep on keeping on.

As always please keep the men and woman of all our military in your prayers for a safe return as they are off protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS here at home. Also please remember those that are going through a challenging time right now in their own life that they may have the strength and guidance for the road ahead of them. God Bless.

The next right thing...

"It is not fair to ask of others what you, are not willing to do yourself." Eleanor Roosevelt

Have you ever gone to do something either for yourself or another person and asked yourself, is this the next right thing to do? Am I doing it for the right reasons? Is this about purity not selfishness? Let's face it often times people do things for others because of what they have to gain from the action. No matter how big or small the gain may be. A genuine person doesn't need to shower others with material gifts. The most precious gifts are things such as paying attention to others, respecting them for who they are, showing love and giving of our time. I recently had a situation where I have done all these things and in the end the person did not return the respect and ending up wasting a lot of time, mine and many others as well. We all offered unconditional love and support no matter what time day or night this person needed. Expecting nothing in return. Only doing it because we believed in this person and tried to help them see what others also saw they were capable of. Was it the next right thing? Yes. Was it for the right reasons? Absolutely. Was it for selfish reasons? Definitely not. When it all fell apart I had to question my reasons, my actions and motives for the part I played in this situation. I stand behind my part, knowing that I truly wanted to help with nothing to gain.

I am a firm believer that how we treat others will come back to us in some form or another. Offering others understanding and compassion changes how we perceive the world around us on a daily basis. The truth of the matter is, our own attitudes often determine what kind of experiences we'll have. For example if you view the world as being shit, then your attitude will be such. Anger and resentment won't bring us peace folks. I promise! There is an old saying I really like; "think it into a reality", meaning that if you fill your head with good things then good things will come and vise versa. The challenge comes when something does not goes as originally planned that we need to find the strength to push through the negative and stay in the positive. Remember what you put in the world will come back to you. The whole world is changed by the tiniest of acts. Do good show love!!

However, wherever and whomever we choose to help is unimportant. There are those in need everywhere. But when we figure out how to sincerely help other people, we'll have also learned how to be happy for a lifetime. See folks I try to surround myself with people who will hold me up when I feel like laying down and giving up. People that show me over and over that its ok to start trusting again. People that want only the best for me so that I can return the favor to be/give the best in return. I am very blessed in that I have GREAT support system. Lets face it life and living is about the "WE" factor not the "ME" factor. We need always remember that life is purposeful, and the events involving us are by design not by chance.

As always please continue to cover our men and woman of all branches of the military for a safe return home one day as they are protecting our HEALTHY FREEDOMS.